Romance scams have become a growing epidemic in the UK, particularly targeting vulnerable individuals like Poppy, an 84-year-old woman from Oldham, Manchester, who found herself ensnared by online fraudsters after a tragic loss in her personal life. In 2019, after her husband of 27 years, Gary, passed away, Poppy found herself struggling with loneliness, particularly during the evenings when the isolation seemed most profound.
The pandemic only deepened her sense of isolation, and she turned to online platforms, including Scrabble Go, to pass the time and engage with others. It was here, in a game that once provided comfort, that her nightmare began.
A Dangerous Escape: The Start of the Scam
In March 2021, Poppy was contacted by a man named “Jim,” who introduced himself as a 66-year-old American working on an oil rig in the Gulf of Mexico. He claimed to have a 15-year-old daughter who needed a life-saving operation. As their online conversations became more frequent, Jim allegedly encountered a financial emergency and requested Poppy’s help. He asked for £4,000 to pay for the surgery, providing her with bank details for a transfer.
Though Poppy had her suspicions, she was convinced by Jim’s story and went to her local NatWest bank to wire the funds. It was only when bank staff intervened and informed her that she was likely being scammed that the gravity of the situation began to sink in. She was upset and confused, but with the support of her family, they blocked Jim’s account, hoping it would be the end of the matter. Unfortunately, it was only the beginning.
The Escalation: A Second Scam
Just six months after the first scam, Poppy received another message—this time from “Larry,” a man claiming to be a wealthy businessman traveling the world. Larry’s story mirrored Jim’s: his bank account had been frozen due to a suspicious deposit, and he requested that Poppy purchase Apple and Google Play gift cards for him. He told her they were needed to cover his expenses until his account was unblocked. Eager to help, Poppy complied, buying over £4,000 worth of gift cards.
Poppy’s vulnerability grew as Larry continued to request additional funds, including £900 for a new phone so they could have a video call. She bought the cards, but things took a sinister turn when she received a message from Larry’s supposed “doctor,” informing her that Larry had passed away. In the aftermath, she was instructed to pay £1,000 to receive his belongings—money that, of course, never arrived.
The Final Blow: A Third Scam
The third scam began in early 2023 when Poppy received a message from “Bill,” a medic allegedly working with NATO on a secret mission in Russia. Bill’s situation mirrored the others: his account was frozen, and he needed Poppy’s help to cover his medical bills. Over the next year, Poppy sent more than £13,000 worth of gift cards to Bill to help him pay for plane tickets and medical expenses. She was eventually told she needed to pay another £600 in gift cards to allow Bill to take leave and visit her. Again, the scam continued with no tangible results.
It was only after Poppy’s brother, James, took over managing her finances, due to her growing memory loss, that the full extent of the scams came to light. “I was horrified going through her statements,” James said. “The color drained from Poppy’s face when I told her how much money she had sent—she couldn’t remember sending a lot of it over.”
James, distressed by the situation, immediately reported the fraud to the police. Fortunately, Poppy’s bank, NatWest, refunded £16,000 of her losses, though £4,000 could not be recovered.
The Growing Epidemic of Romance Scams
Poppy’s experience is far from unique. Romance scams have surged in recent years, driven by the increased time people spent online during the Covid-19 pandemic. Data from Action Fraud revealed that in 2024, there were over 9,000 reports of romance scams in the UK, with victims losing a total of £99.4 million—up 13% from the previous year. This rise in fraud is in part due to the shift of scammers from dating apps to other platforms, including social media and online gaming arenas like Scrabble Go.
According to criminologist Elisabeth Carter, the rise in romance scams can be traced back to the pandemic, when fraudsters moved their activities online to avoid detection. These criminals have become adept at exploiting vulnerable individuals, especially those who are isolated or experiencing memory loss. Carter noted, “Once you have been a victim of this kind of crime, you are actually more vulnerable to being a victim of the same kind of fraud again.”
The tactics used by scammers are designed to isolate victims and build a false sense of emotional connection, much like the grooming seen in cases of domestic abuse. Fraudsters will often use the same language and strategies to manipulate their targets, making them feel responsible for the well-being of the scammer.
A Call for Action and New Rules
Social media platforms, including Facebook, Instagram, and WhatsApp, have become key areas for fraudsters to operate, with over 31% of romance scams in 2023 reported to have involved these platforms. Meta, which owns these services, acknowledged the problem and stated it was investing in technology to detect suspicious activity. However, experts like Carter argue that more needs to be done to protect users. She highlighted the lack of protection on social media platforms and called for stricter regulations to prevent scammers from exploiting users.
A recent change in UK regulations aims to help victims recover lost funds more quickly. Under new rules implemented in October 2024, victims of scams involving authorised push payments will be reimbursed by their banks within five working days, with a limit of £85,000. This change has been seen as a step in the right direction, though experts agree that cross-industry collaboration between banks, social media companies, and law enforcement is essential to tackling this growing issue.
As for Poppy, her family continues to monitor her finances to prevent further harm. “She was lucky to get some of her money back,” James said. “But the emotional toll of what happened is something she will carry with her forever.”
Romance scams, while not new, are an increasingly sophisticated threat, preying on the loneliness and vulnerability of older individuals. With the rise in scams showing no sign of slowing down, both individuals and institutions must remain vigilant to protect those most at risk.
